Correction disserte

Nombre de messages : 3 Date d'inscription : 31/01/2010

Bonjours a tous, alors mon prof nous a donné une redaction a faire en anglais sur "As one grows older,how important is it to keep souvenirs of one's past ?Take examples from your own experience"Le sujet a deja été traité ici mais j'ai fait ma propre redaction mais elle aurait besoin d'une bonne correction.Merci d'avance.

Voila ce que j'ai fait:

With old age, many are the diseases which assign the old people like that of Alzheimer .What's more, the memories (memory) of a whole life can be forgotten in little time .Well to have memories (with the direction object) can be very useful.

The memories of its past are very significant, indeed for certain people with the passing of years, they lose the memory, partially or completely. It thus becomes necessary to have objects of its life passed for its recalling moments of its childhood. The photographs are undoubtedly the best memories than one can keep. They are the witnesses of a life passed, and a remote childhood. They make it possible to remind things last .And is thus consequently significant.

In addition to the photographs, it is significant to keep its letters, of loves and others…Thus, one can remember his first loves which one had forgotten, of the buddies of last, and that must surely be very amusing when one is old. For example, I even when I look at old photographs several years, I even discover things on me as I did not know. For example I did not know that I liked vegetables when I was children.

Moreover, when objects of his past are kept, one can show them to our children and to our family .So the joy of reminding itself moments of its childhood or several ten years with its family is very pleasant and your children discovers on you constraining things: the silly things which one made for example.

Lastly, when one dies, that leaves a trace of its passage over ground, and allows that one remembers us.

To conclude, it is very significant to preserve objects of a whole life. They make it possible to remember events forgotten for a long time, even to learn from the things on oneself. It is thus necessary well to preserve the photographs, the letters or clothing of its childhood.

Salut, Hugo.

Tu l'auras ce soir. C'est que je suis assez occupé aujourd'hui. J'espère bien que ça va pas te déranger.

Ed

Nombre de messages : 3 Date d'inscription : 31/01/2010

ok d'accord merci beaucoup doudou.Pour 19h heure francaise se serai parfait.

With old age, many are the diseases which assign the old people like that of Alzheimer .
With old age come the many diseases that the elderly are afflicted with, such as Alzheimer's disease.
What's more, the memories (memory) of a whole life can be forgotten in little time .
What's more, the memories of a lifetime can disappear in a short period of time.
Well to have memories (with the direction object) can be very useful.
The function of memory is both important and necessary.
The memories of its past are very significant, indeed for certain people with the passing of years, they lose the memory, partially or completely.
The memories of one's past are very significant. The unfortunate fact is that certain people lose their memory either partially or completely with the passage of time.
It thus becomes necessary to have objects of its life passed for its recalling moments of its childhood.
It thus becomes necessary for the objects of one's life to be available in order to help one recall childhood events.
The photographs are undoubtedly the best memories than one can keep.
Photographs are undoubtedly the best sources of recollections that one can have on hand.
They are the witnesses of a life passed, and a remote childhood. They make it possible to remind things last .And is thus consequently significant.
They are the witnesses of the life one has spent, starting with one's remote childhood. They make it possible to be reminded of the past, and are thus significant.
In addition to the photographs, it is significant to keep its letters, of loves and others…Thus, one can remember his first loves which one had forgotten, of the buddies of last, and that must surely be very amusing when one is old.
In addition to photographs, one should keep letters from friends and love letters to help remember happier days when one was younger. A person will more quickly remember his first love and former pals, even when he is old.
For example, I even when I look at old photographs several years, I even discover things on me as I did not know. For example I did not know that I liked vegetables when I was children.
For example, even when I look at old photos, ones that were taken years earlier, I discover things about myself and my past that I had forgotten. As an example, I didn't realize that I liked vegetables when I was a child.
Moreover, when objects of his past are kept, one can show them to our children and to our family .
Moreover, when someone keeps the objects related to his past, he can show them to his children and other family members.
So the joy of reminding itself moments of its childhood or several ten years with its family is very pleasant and your children discovers on you constraining things: the silly things which one made for example.
So, the joy of reminding oneself of ones's childhood and the pleasant times spent with family is then shared with one's children who can discover what you did when you were younger.
Lastly, when one dies, that leaves a trace of its passage over ground, and allows that one remembers us. To conclude, it is very significant to preserve objects of a whole life. They make it possible to remember events forgotten for a long time, even to learn from the things on oneself. It is thus necessary well to preserve the photographs, the letters or clothing of its childhood.
Lastly, when a person dies, he leaves a trace of his life that others can share in. To conclude, it is very important to preserve the objects that he has accumulated over a lifetime. These objects make it possible to remember events forgotten for a long time and to learn things about himself. So, one should save every photo, every letter, and every garment worn in childhood.

Glitter Graphics

Nombre de messages : 3 Date d'inscription : 31/01/2010

Merci beaucoup doudou Smile

,c'est tres gentil de ta part.

You're welcome, Hugo. I'm glad I could help.

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