Study Hall
Study Hall

(Aide aux devoirs)
 
AccueilFAQS'enregistrerConnexion

Partagez | 
 

 Rédaction

Voir le sujet précédent Voir le sujet suivant Aller en bas 
AuteurMessage
Lysias1148

avatar

Nombre de messages : 100
Date d'inscription : 09/02/2008

MessageSujet: Rédaction   Sam 4 Oct - 18:53

Bonjour, pourrais-je avoir de l'aide s'il vous plaît. Pour ma rédaction peux-tu dire si c'est faux pour que je sache où sont mes fautes avant de changer les tournures ou de faire des modifications merci:

'Do you find it easier to talk about your personal life and problems with your friends or your family?'

Problems are an integral part of life; some are suffered by everyone, while other are more personals. Those may be the hardest ones to share; who between our friends or our family is it more casual to talk with?
In my opinion, the support of true friends is equal to the one provided by our family. However, they compete each other through differents categories: they are more or less complementary. On the one hand, family is the most reliable on given that this is the main function of a family. On the other hand, friends usually have the same mentality because of the same age. Although the family’s members are the first known since we were born, it created personal links that may affect the share of feelings, above all when the root cause comes from the family or if the problem is sensitive (love, drugs…). Thus, embarrassment takes place and grows little by little. We think of our family as if it has never been young and it’s all the more hard-fought to open our heart to adults than youngsters like our friends. It is obvious that issues between friends can’t be directly share without consulting responsible person such as our family to know what to do. The reaction on either side is also a major factor which will determine the choice to entrust one or the other. We fear of the thoughts of the others, therefore, we mainly turn toward the one who will be the most comprehensive. Surprisingly, we’re award of our family having gone through most of our problems since they are older, but we tend to talk with our friends.
There was once a time when the family was the primary confidant. Young as we were, from kinder garden to middle school, we were such simple-minded, stridden (stride?) by such insignificants issues. But then it comes a period called the “adolescence” when a gap is dug between us and our family, compensated by a rapprochement toward our friends. Curiously, during our studies (when we are often separated to our family), the link that used to be so strong between our family recover. Therefore, talking with either family or friends also depend on the period we’re going through. As far as I’m concern, it is as difficult to talk to our family as to our friends.
Talking about our personal issues has never been simple. Family as well as friends are both able to listen to our problems but they are not consulted for the same problems. We can’t say one is easier than the other one since they are both useful. Friends have never been so compulsory in our society. Is the family pushed aside?

C'est probablement un peu hors sujet mais c'est pas grave lol. Si tu as des commentaires je veux bien ^^ Merci encore
Revenir en haut Aller en bas
Doudou



Nombre de messages : 1289
Localisation : New-York
Date d'inscription : 26/12/2005

MessageSujet: Re: Rédaction   Sam 4 Oct - 19:53

J'ai pas compris. Comment je peux indiquer les fautes que tu as faites sans faire de modifications ? confused
Revenir en haut Aller en bas
Lysias1148

avatar

Nombre de messages : 100
Date d'inscription : 09/02/2008

MessageSujet: Re: Rédaction   Dim 5 Oct - 18:02

lol désolé je voulais dire que si tu modifies tu peux dire en quoi ma phrase est fausse s'il te plaît? ex: He later came = ça se dit pas
modif = he came later

^^"
Merci
Revenir en haut Aller en bas
Doudou



Nombre de messages : 1289
Localisation : New-York
Date d'inscription : 26/12/2005

MessageSujet: Re: Rédaction   Dim 5 Oct - 23:18

Je vais souligner chaque faute.

Do you find it easier to talk about your personal life and problems with your friends or your family?'

Problems are an integral part of life; some are suffered by everyone, while other are more personals.
Problems are an integral part of life. Some are shared by everyone, while others are more personal.

Those may be the hardest ones to share; who between our friends or our family is it more casual to talk with?
Those may be the hardest ones to share. Deciding whom it's easier to talk to isn't easy.

In my opinion, the support of true friends is equal to the one provided by our family.
In my opinion, the support of true friends is equal to that provided by family members.

However, they compete each other through differents categories: they are more or less complementary.
However, friends and family fall into different but somewhat complementary categories.

On the one hand, family is the most reliable on given that this is the main function of a family.
On the one hand, family by its very nature is the more reliable of the two.

On the other hand, friends usually have the same mentality because of the same age.
On the other hand, friends who are your age will usually share your mindset.

Although the family’s members are the first known since we were born, it created personal links that may affect the share of feelings, above all when the root cause comes from the family or if the problem is sensitive (love, drugs…).
Although we've known the members of our family since we were born, some problems may be so personal that it becomes difficult to share our feelings with them especially if the problem comes from the family or involves some other sensitive issue such as love or drugs.

Thus, embarrassment takes place and grows little by little.
A situation like that can cause quite a bit of embarassment.

We think of our family as if it has never been young and it’s all the more hard-fought to open our heart to adults than youngsters like our friends.
We think of the members of our family as never having been young, which makes it all the more difficult to open our hearts to them than to friends our own age.

It is obvious that issues between friends can’t be directly share without consulting responsible person such as our family to know what to do.
It's obvious that issues between friends can't be dealt with without consulting a responsible adult within our family for a solution.

The reaction on either side is also a major factor which will determine the choice to entrust one or the other.
The possible reaction on either side is also a major factor to consider in one's choice.

We fear of the thoughts of the others, therefore, we mainly turn toward the one who will be the most comprehensive.
We fear how people will react to our problem, so we turn toward the most understanding person.

Surprisingly, we’re award of our family having gone through most of our problems since they are older, but we tend to talk with our friends.
Even though family members have dealt with these same problems when they were younger, we tend to share our problems with friends.

There was once a time when the family was the primary confidant.
There once was a time when the family was our primary confidant.

Young as we were, from kinder garden to middle school, we were such simple-minded, stridden (stride?) by such insignificants issues.
Je comprends pas cette phrase.

But then it comes a period called the “adolescence” when a gap is dug between us and our family, compensated by a rapprochement toward our friends.
But then a period called "adolescence" comes along during which a gap forms between us and our family and we gravitate toward our friends.

Curiously, during our studies (when we are often separated to our family), the link that used to be so strong between our family recover.
Curiously, while we're at university (when we're often separated from family), the link that used to be so strong between us and family is reestablished.

Therefore, talking with either family or friends also depend on the period we’re going through.
Therefore, our choice of confidants depends on the period of emotional growth we're going through.

As far as I’m concern, it is as difficult to talk to our family as to our friends.
As far as I'm concerned, it's as difficult to talk to family members as to our friends.

Talking about our personal issues has never been simple.
Talking about personal issues is never easy.

Family as well as friends are both able to listen to our problems but they are not consulted for the same problems.
There are some problems we can discuss only with family and some we can discuss only with friends.

We can’t say one is easier than the other one since they are both useful.
I can't say one is easier than the other since both are useful.

Friends have never been so compulsory in our society. Is the family pushed aside?
Je comprends pas ces deux phrases.


Dernière édition par Doudou le Mar 7 Oct - 15:05, édité 1 fois
Revenir en haut Aller en bas
Lysias1148

avatar

Nombre de messages : 100
Date d'inscription : 09/02/2008

MessageSujet: Re: Rédaction   Lun 6 Oct - 22:23

- "some are suffered by everyone" comment pourrait-on dire: "certains (problèmes) sont connus par tout le monde" (tout le monde en souffre ex: la moquerie (en présumant que tout le monde en souffre bien que ce n'est pas le cas)).
- "[...]it's easier to talk to isn't easy" peut-on remplacer esaier par more casual? ou n'a-t-il pas le même sens.
- est-ce que "other" peut-être invariable dans certaines phrases?
- "friends and family fall into different but somewhat complementary categories."
- "family is the most reliable on given that this is the main function of a family." peux-on traduire "la famille est celle (comparé avec les amis) sur qui on peut compter le plus vu que c'est sa fonction principale"?
- "friends usually have the same mentality because of the same age." c'est dit de façon maladroite ou c'est grammaticalement faux?
- "the root cause" ça se dit? (de façon générale. Parce que je sais que "the main cause" existe mais je me demandais s'il existait un autre synonyme)
- "We think of the members of our family as never having been young(1), which makes it all the more difficult to open our hearts to them than to friends our own age (2)." Je vois un point intéressant:
-(1) tournure intéressante: quel est ça formule, vu que je ne vois pas de "if" qui impose l'hypothèse. as + adverbe de temps +... ?
-(2) pourquoi peut-on omettre le "of" (friends of our own age) ou pourquoi ne peut-on pas le mettre lol.
- comment traduirais-tu: "Bien que nous soyons conscient que notre famille ait traversé ces même problèmes, nous nous tournons vers nos amis (quand même)" = Even though we'r econscious that family members have dealt with these same problems when they were younger, we tend to share our problems with friends. Je veux juste faire apparaître le fait qu'on sait qu'on est conscient mais on ne sait pas pourquoi parfois on se confie aux amis.
- "during which a gap forms" comment pourrait-on dire: "un fossé se creuse" pour montrer qu'il "empire", un effet de continuité. Question outside: quelle est l'idiome pour "tomber de Charybde en Scylla"
- "I can't say one is easier than the other since both are useful." quand peux-t-on omettre le "the other one"?
- "Friends have never been so compulsory in our society. Is the family pushed aside?": "Le rôle que les amis tiennent dans notre société d'aujourd'hui n'a jamais été si fort (parce qu'avant au moyen-age les amis ne jouait pas un rôle si important qu'un confident, alors qu'aujourd'hui si). Donc "Est-ce que la famille est mise de côté (ou du moins de plus en plus).
- "Young as we were, from kinder garden to middle school, we were such simple-minded, stridden (stride?) by such insignificants issues." = Jeunes comme nous étions, de la cour des petis jusqu'au collège, on était plutôt "naif" (pas dans le sens péjoratif mais plutôt la naïveté des petis enfants quand ils demandent un bonbon =) ) et traversés, parcourus par des problèmes insignifiants (il a volé mon bonbon...)

phew beaucoup de questions lol désolé. J'essaie de comprendre pourquoi je peux pas mettre ci et ça lol.
Revenir en haut Aller en bas
Doudou



Nombre de messages : 1289
Localisation : New-York
Date d'inscription : 26/12/2005

MessageSujet: Re: Rédaction   Mar 7 Oct - 13:05

- "some are suffered by everyone" comment pourrait-on dire: "certains (problèmes) sont connus par tout le monde" (tout le monde en souffre
1. Some problems are shared by everyone.
2. Certain problems are common to everybody.

ex: la moquerie (en présumant que tout le monde en souffre bien que ce n'est pas le cas).
... mockery (assuming everone has experienced it, although it's not the case).

Rappelle-toi que l'anglais et le français ce sont des cousins, pas des jumeaux.


- "[...]it's easier to talk to isn't easy" peut-on remplacer esaier par more casual? ou n'a-t-il pas le même sens.
On peut dire : When it comes to discussing your problems, you can be more casual with friends than with parents or relatives.

- est-ce que "other" peut-être invariable dans certaines phrases?
Où est le contexte ?

- "friends and family fall into different but somewhat complementary categories."
Quelle est ta question ?

- "family is the most more reliable on given that this is the main function of a family."
Est-ce que tu dis que être digne de confiance c'est la fonction principale d'une famille ?
peux-on traduire "la famille est celle (comparé avec les amis) sur qui on peut compter le plus vu que c'est sa fonction principale"?
Trad : You can count on family more than you can on friends since that's its main function.

- "friends usually have the same mentality because of the same age." c'est dit de façon maladroite ou c'est grammaticalement faux?
les deux

- "the root cause" ça se dit? (de façon générale. Parce que je sais que "the main cause" existe mais je me demandais s'il existait un autre synonyme)
the root cause est plus usité. On peut également dire : the main reason ou the underlying cause/reason.

- "We think of the members of our family as never having been young(1), which makes it all the more difficult to open our hearts to them than to friends our own age (2)." Je vois un point intéressant:
-(1) tournure intéressante: quel est ça formule, vu que je ne vois pas de "if" qui impose l'hypothèse. as + adverbe de temps +... ?
On doit réaliser qu'il peut bien y avoir de multiples manières de traduire certaines tournures ou mots. On peut exprimer l'hypothèse de plusieurs façons différentes. Mais si ton/ta prof exige l'utilisation de if, on peut remanier les mots de la sorte : We look upon the older members of our family as if they had never been young.

-(2) pourquoi peut-on omettre le "of" (friends of our own age) ou pourquoi ne peut-on pas le mettre lol.
On peut bien dire friends of our own age, mais c'est moins usité.

- comment traduirais-tu: "Bien que nous soyons conscient que notre famille ait traversé ces même problèmes, nous nous tournons vers nos amis (quand même)" = Even though we'r econscious that family members have dealt with these same problems when they were younger, we tend to share our problems with friends. Je veux juste faire apparaître le fait qu'on sait qu'on est conscient mais on ne sait pas pourquoi parfois on se confie aux amis.
Even though we're aware of the fact (ou Even though we know) that our family has gone through (ou experienced ou dealt with) these same problems

- "during which a gap forms" comment pourrait-on dire: "un fossé se creuse" pour montrer qu'il "empire", un effet de continuité.
a widening gap (ou breach). Le terme populaire c'est generation gap.
Question outside: quelle est l'idiome pour "tomber de Charybde en Scylla"
1. to jump from the pot into the frying pan
2. to go from bad to worse


- "I can't say one is easier than the other since both are useful." quand peux-t-on omettre le "the other one"?
1. Quand on se réfère aux objets, on dit the other one.
Exemple : Do you want this pen or the other one?
2. Quand on se réfère aux actions, on dit the other.
Exemple : You have to decide if you're going to do one thing or the other.


- "Friends have never been so compulsory in our society. Is the family pushed aside?": "Le rôle que les amis tiennent dans notre société d'aujourd'hui n'a jamais été si fort (parce qu'avant au moyen-age les amis ne jouait pas un rôle si important qu'un confident, alors qu'aujourd'hui si). Donc "Est-ce que la famille est mise de côté (ou du moins de plus en plus).
Il y a tant de manières qu'on peut traduire cette phrase !
The role of friends in today's society has never been so great (ou has never been greater). Has family been pushed aside? (ou Has family been kicked to the curb?)

Parlant des rôles, on dit :
1. a key role
2. a vital role
3. a bigger (ou greater) role
4. a decisive role
5. a dominant role
6. a prominent role
7. a conspicuous role
et ainsi de suite


- "Young as we were, from kinder garden to middle school, we were such simple-minded, stridden (stride?) by such insignificants issues." = Jeunes comme nous étions, de la cour des petis jusqu'au collège, on était plutôt "naif" (pas dans le sens péjoratif mais plutôt la naïveté des petis enfants quand ils demandent un bonbon =) ) et traversés, parcourus par des problèmes insignifiants (il a volé mon bonbon...)
1. Being as young as we were, from kindergarten to middle school, we were somewhat naive and preoccupied with unimportant issues.
2. In our youth, from kindergarten to middle school, we were rather inexperienced in the ways of the world and completely absorbed by insignificant problems.
3. When we were young, from kindergarten to middle school, we were kind of naive and caught up with problems of a very trivial nature (ou trivialities).

Revenir en haut Aller en bas
Lysias1148

avatar

Nombre de messages : 100
Date d'inscription : 09/02/2008

MessageSujet: Re: Rédaction   Mer 8 Oct - 18:42

Meuhrci! ^^
Revenir en haut Aller en bas
Contenu sponsorisé




MessageSujet: Re: Rédaction   

Revenir en haut Aller en bas
 
Rédaction
Voir le sujet précédent Voir le sujet suivant Revenir en haut 
Page 1 sur 1
 Sujets similaires
-
» s'évaluer en rédaction.
» [6ème] Rédaction d'un poème
» Commentaire rédaction
» travailler la rédaction
» Travailler la rédaction en 3ème

Permission de ce forum:Vous ne pouvez pas répondre aux sujets dans ce forum
Study Hall :: Devoirs maison :: anglais (grammaire, rédacs courtes, trads courtes}-
Sauter vers: