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Lysias1148



Nombre de messages : 100
Date d'inscription : 09/02/2008

MessageSujet: Texte   Dim 2 Mar - 22:25

Bonjour! J'ai un texte à écrire, si vous pourriez me le corriger s'il vous plaît. C'est une personne qui écrit à sa famille (plus précisément à sa soeur) alors qu'il n'a plus écrit depuis longtemps. Le garçon en question a émigrer et donc a été séparer de sa famille:

My dear whole family,


It’s been so long since I last wrote to you. I feel terribly sorry. During my trip to New York I had time and space to write to you but since I reached New York, everything went so fast. I didn’t have much time, even to think or take care of myself. I know how worried you are and I felt guilty not having inform you about my situation. As you know, I met this sweet girl named Shilver, on my way to New York. She wanted to go along with me at all cost (she seemed lost. I helped her reached the New York ground (le sol New Yorkais) with me) but I managed too reason her not to do so. Afterwards, I thought my way to California. It was all the tougher (hard?) since “dès lors que” I landed to New York, I realized that all my money had vanished. A nasty trick from boys aboard I presume. “Du moins”, almost all my money disappeared. Owing to you, I didn’t carry all my money on me and put some in my suitcase. Still, I was thoroughly desperate since I hadn’t enough money to attain to California anymore. What am I going to do, I thought. How stupid from me it was. I was in New York “pardi” (j’étais à New York pardi!), where there are plenty of works and well-paid! As a matter of fact, it wasn’t that simple, particularly for a skilless man. Above all when thousands people land a day. But by perseverance someone finally hired me. Thus, I worked as an assistant of a cobbler. It was more exhausting than it sound (plus fatiguant qu’il n’y parait). I was giving little time to sleep, much less (encore moins) to eat. When my master woke up early, so did I. I was constantly moving, now taking commands, now supplying and so on (tantôt prenant des commandes, tantôt faisant les reserves (du magasin)). You bet I could inform you anyway (tu penses bien que j’aurai quand meme put te tenir au courant…) about my businesses, but I wanted my economy to be the most profitable, although writing paper cost a bare (combine tu penses que tu papier letter coutait? Lol dans les années 1850) 0.2£/$? Two months goes by, and I was back on my way to California by the summer. I though money was the only problem for a trip but I reckon that there were many other issues. I had to take several way of transportation because there wasn’t one for all the trip. What’s more, stranger are often feared, go know why (va savoir pourquoi), maybe because stranger don’t always have money... After some unending roads I ended up in California when autumn was beginning. There, I immediately apply for several jobs. It was way less difficult to find one since I acquired skills during my last job, and the day after I was hired… by a cobbler! My abilities attracted him and he was somehow astonished. I was a good apprentice and I learned really fast. What intrigued me the most is that even in winter, people work even more harder in sight of festivities. I had the luck to spend Christmas and the New Year with my master’s family. It’s really different than in Dublin. I ate so much than I couldn’t eat for a day.
“En moins de temps qu’il faut pour le dire”, I gathered enough money to make a well living, “si bien que” soon, I”ll be able to open my own shop roughly speaking, I’ll be a cabbler who’s in need of an assistant. That’s why five days ago, I asked my friend Ellena to join me. I’m still waiting for her to reply. How selfish I am, you must be thinking but I know my business we’ll grow faster with Ellena so that in little time, I’ll gather enough money to support you (vous aidez). “En tout cas”, your letter gave me one more reason to work hard. I know how tough it is in Dublin, but I’ll do my best to help the family. By the way, I’m so delighted about Emilie and Jake. She has grown so much. I look forward to taking part in their wedding. I planned on marring Shannon too, but I haven’t requested her, although I’m pretty sure she’ll agree. We get on well.
I hope the best for you. I will have time to reply every now and again to notify you about the situation here. Don’t worry anymore, the worst passed ( le pire est passé). Give my love to the rest of the family and see you soon.

Much love, as always.

Je sais que c'est long et je suis désolé mais vous pouvez prendre votre temps. Ce n'est pas pressé. Merci d'avance! Very Happy
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Doudou



Nombre de messages : 1286
Localisation : New-York
Date d'inscription : 26/12/2005

MessageSujet: Re: Texte   Mar 4 Mar - 12:59

Le garçon en question a émigré et donc a été séparé de sa famille:

My dear whole family,
To every cherished member of my family,

It’s been so long since I last wrote to you.
Rien à corriger
I feel terribly sorry.
Please accept my sincerest apololgies.
During my trip to New York I had time and space to write to you but since I reached New York, everything went so fast. I didn’t have much time, even to think or take care of myself.
During my trip to New York, I had plenty of time to write; but ever since arriving in New York, I've barely had time to think or even take care of myself.
I know how worried you are and I felt guilty not having inform you about my situation.
I know how worried you must be, and I feel guilty about not keeping you informed about my situation.
As you know, I met this sweet girl named Shilver, on my way to New York.
As you know, I met this sweet girl whose name is Shilver on my way back to New York.
She wanted to go along with me at all cost (she seemed lost.
She insisted on go along with me. She seemed lost.
I helped her reached the New York ground (le sol New Yorkais) with me) but I managed too reason her not to do so.
I helped her reach her New York destination, but I managed to keep her from going with me.
Afterwards, I thought my way to California. It was all the tougher (hard?) since “dès lors que” I landed to New York, I realized that all my money had vanished.
Afterwards, my trip to California became particularly difficult because I realized that practically all my money had vanished ever since landing in New York.
A nasty trick from boys aboard I presume.
I assumed it was a nasty trick by someone aboard the plane.
“Du moins”, almost all my money disappeared.
That must have been the reason for the disappearance of most of my money.
Owing to you, I didn’t carry all my money on me and put some in my suitcase.
Thanks to your advice, I didn't carry all my money with me, but kept some in my suitcase.
Still, I was thoroughly desperate since I hadn’t enough money to attain to California anymore.
Still, I was thoroughly desperate since I no longer had enough money to reach California.
What am I going to do, I thought.
Rien à corriger.
How stupid from me it was.
How stupid I was.
I was in New York “pardi” (j’étais à New York pardi!), where there are plenty of works and well-paid!
But I was in New York where there are plenty of good-paying jobs!
As a matter of fact, it wasn’t that simple, particularly for a skilless man. Above all when thousands people land a day.
But in fact, it wasn't that simple, particularly for a man without skills and especially when thousands of people are landing every day.
But by perseverance someone finally hired me.
But with perseverance, someone finally hired me.
Thus, I worked as an assistant of a cobbler.
So, I ended up being a shoemaker's assistant.
It was more exhausting than it sounds.
I was giving little time to sleep, much less (encore moins) to eat.
I hardly had any time to sleep, much less to eat.
When my master woke up early, so did I.
My boss' early to rise schedule became my mine as well.
I was constantly moving, now taking commands, now supplying and so on (tantôt prenant des commandes, tantôt faisant les reserves (du magasin)).
I was constantly on the go, sometimes taking customer orders and other times taking inventory.
You bet I could inform you anyway (tu penses bien que j’aurai quand meme put te tenir au courant…) about my businesses, but I wanted my economy to be the most profitable, although writing paper cost a bare (combine tu penses que tu papier letter coutait? Lol dans les années 1850) 0.2£/$?
You're probably thinking that I still could have kept in touch with you about my affairs, but I had to keep an eye on my expenses, even though writing paper costs so little.
Two months goes by, and I was back on my way to California by the summer.
After two months, I was on my way back to California for the summer.
I though money was the only problem for a trip but I reckon that there were many other issues.
I thought money was my only problem, but I began to see that I had to deal with many other issues.
I had to take several way of transportation because there wasn’t one for all the trip.
I had to take several different types of transportation because there wasn't just one way to take the trip.
What’s more, stranger are often feared, go know why (va savoir pourquoi), maybe because stranger don’t always have money... After some unending roads I ended up in California when autumn was beginning.
What's more, foreigners are often feared (go figure!), maybe because they don't always have money. But after traveling on unending roads, I ended up in California where autumn was just beginning.
There, I immediately apply for several jobs.
Once there, I immediately applied for several jobs.
It was way less difficult to find one since I acquired skills during my last job, and the day after I was hired… by a cobbler!
It was way less difficult to get one this time since I already had the skills I acquired from my last job, and the next day I was hired... by another shoemaker!
My abilities attracted him and he was somehow astonished. I was a good apprentice and I learned really fast.
My abilities attracted his attention, and he was rather astonished. I was a good apprentice, and I learned really fast.
What intrigued me the most is that even in winter, people work even more harder in sight of festivities. I had the luck to spend Christmas and the New Year with my master’s family. It’s really different than in Dublin. I ate so much than I couldn’t eat for a day.
What intrigued me the most was that even in the winter, people work even harder at the approach of the holidays.
“En moins de temps qu’il faut pour le dire”, I gathered enough money to make a well living, “si bien que” soon, I”ll be able to open my own shop roughly speaking, I’ll be a cabbler who’s in need of an assistant. That’s why five days ago, I asked my friend Ellena to join me. I’m still waiting for her to reply.
In less time than it takes to say so, I saved up enough money to live comfortably; with the result that I'll be able to open my own shop so to speak. I'll be a shoemaker in need of an assistant. That's why five days ago, I asked my friend Ellena to join me. I'm still waiting for her answer.
How selfish I am, you must be thinking but I know my business we’ll grow faster with Ellena so that in little time, I’ll gather enough money to support you (vous aider).
You must be thinking how selfish I am, but I know my business will grow faster with Ellena as a partner so that in a short period of time, I'll have enough money saved up to support you.
“En tout cas”, your letter gave me one more reason to work hard. I know how tough it is in Dublin, but I’ll do my best to help the family. By the way, I’m so delighted about Emilie and Jake. She has grown so much. I look forward to taking part in their wedding. I planned on marring Shannon too, but I haven’t requested her, although I’m pretty sure she’ll agree. We get on well.
In any case, your letter gave me one more reason to work hard. I know how tough it is in Dublin, but I'll do my best to help the family. By the way, I'm so delighted about Emilie and Jake. She has grown so much. I look forward to attending their wedding. I planned on marrying Shannon, but I haven't proposed to her yet; although I'm pretty sure she'll accept. We get on well with each other.
I hope the best for you. I will have time to reply every now and again to notify you about the situation here. Don’t worry anymore, the worst passed ( le pire est passé). Give my love to the rest of the family and see you soon.
I wish you the best. I'll have time to answer your letters every now and again to keep you up-to-date about the situation here. I don't want you to worry about me anymore. The worst is over. Give my love to the rest of the family, and see you soon.

All my love, as always.

Aux É-U, où le narrateur de cette lettre dit qu'il vit, on dit pas cobbler.
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Lysias1148



Nombre de messages : 100
Date d'inscription : 09/02/2008

MessageSujet: Re: Texte   Mar 4 Mar - 22:22

Je te remercie beaucoup Doudou! Very Happy
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Doudou



Nombre de messages : 1286
Localisation : New-York
Date d'inscription : 26/12/2005

MessageSujet: Re: Texte   Mar 4 Mar - 22:50

You're very welcome, Lysias. C'est toujours un plaisir.
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MessageSujet: Re: Texte   Aujourd'hui à 3:39

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