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mimi

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Nombre de messages : 115
Date d'inscription : 15/02/2006

MessageSujet: rédac...   Sam 27 Jan - 20:55

Bonjour Doudou, comment allez-vous ?
Moi, je suis débordée, j’ai trop de devoir et plus du tout de temps libre ! eh oui… c’est difficile le lycée ! lol.

Alors voilà, j’ai une petite rédaction à faire pour mardi ( minimum : 100 mots) (sujet ci dessous) Arrow j’aimerais que vous corrigez mes fautes car je suis certaine que j’ai commis plusieurs fautes de grammaire, de langue, de conjugaison etc.…. et me dire ce que vous en pensez si possible. Like a Star @ heaven
Je vous remercie.
A+


Sujet : If you won the lottery, what charity would you help and why ?

There are many charities in the word, only in the UK there are 180.000 charities. It’s difficult to prefer one charity because I think that they are all important.

Yet, if I were rich I would help OXFAM and CHILDERN IN NEED. I gave half my money to OXFAM and the other half to CHILDERN NEED. I choose the both charities because women and children are really fell people. There are more and more women who are attack and aggress; they know violence in the street or from her husband. It’s shocking for me ! In effect this women suffer so I would help them. I would help children too as I love children and I don’t accept that there are disabled, unfortunate and unhappy children without help. Normally they must go to school, play with their friends, laugh… but it’s impossible for them. This children have need of charitable people in order to feel better.

Finally, I thing that the actions of all charities are formidable because they help many people likewise animals, environment… for a better word.
flower flower flower flower flower flower
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Doudou



Nombre de messages : 1286
Localisation : New-York
Date d'inscription : 26/12/2005

MessageSujet: Re: rédac...   Dim 28 Jan - 12:17

Bonjour, Mimi.

There are many charities in the world. In the UK alone, there are some 180,000 charities. It’s difficult to to choose among so many because I think that they are all important.

Yet if I were rich, I would help OXFAM and CHILDERN IN NEED. I'd give half of my money to OXFAM and the other half to CHILDERN IN NEED. I'd choose both charities because women and children are really the neediest. The number of abused women is on the increase. They can expect to be the victims of street violence or spousal abuse. I find it a shocking situation! It's because of the violence they suffer that I have a desire to help them. I would help children too because I love children, and I can't stand to see them disabled, unfortunate, unhappy, and helpless. Children normally go to school, play with their friends, and enjoy themselves; but it’s impossible for these children. They need the help of charitable people in order to feel better.

In the final analysis, I applaud the actions of all charities. I think they're absolutely formidable because they're involved in so many humanitarian activities, such as ecology and animal care.

Voilà. J'espère que ça va t'aider.

Ed
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mimi

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Nombre de messages : 115
Date d'inscription : 15/02/2006

MessageSujet: Re: rédac...   Lun 29 Jan - 13:04

bonjour Doudou,

merci, oui ça m'aide beaucoup!
bye...
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